this is day 2 of notNaNoWriMo. ha!

I got up this morning and didn’t instantly feel bad about myself because it was the start of another dreadful day of no writing. there is NOTHING worse than that feeling. knowing you have to write but are more compelled to do something else ANYthing else instead. like sorting pennies as in these are all copper and these are not or other mindless task that has a beneficial outcome. I like writing when I don’t have to do it. but writing to write because you have write… yuck.

maybe it’s this thing of “doing a book” is what is so off putting? I mean, I don’t have a problem writing a show. I do that a few times a week. okay, that’s NOT really writing in the sense of I’m writing writing. but it is research and thought to connect up flow which brings coherence. without that “writing” it’s banana land behind the mic. at least it is for me.

and I don’t have a problem with writing articles. those have a pretty fast end, not much in the beginning and a long winded middle to the support the top and bottom. easy. or rather I can see the light at the end of the tunnel before I even get in the tunnel. plus I can finish before lunch, let it sit for a few hours then self edit before posting.

I very likely will generate 50K words but it won’t be in the shape of a book. and I’ll feel lots better about me at the end the eleventh month. because that boys and girls is what it’s all about. you put your left foot in

you know one of the biggest oversold memes to hit the bricks is the no distraction writing tools. you know the ones that turn your gorgeous UI windowed workspace into what looks like an Apple II or a TRS-80 screen. you have to use arrow keys to navigate and edit. it’s a stupid step backwards to me. does anyone else find it insulting that so many people buy into thinking they need this to be a writer? it’s very typical of writers to say that they need the physical absence that something like a typewriter provides. truth be told, everyone has used this no distraction tool for 10 minutes, found it infuriating and left it for Word with it’s always entertaining Paper Clip.

I only say this because it’s usually not the tool that is the problem. once I’m writing there is NO WAY I can stop until all the words are on something. I’ve done this on a iPhone, an old Blackjack, on paper and once I called my voice mail again and again until the mailbox was full. when it is that moment you will do anything to capture those words.

the last episode of Mad Men does a feature on one of the writers who has a great idea, thinks he writes it down, realizes that he can’t find it, does everything to remake it but can’t recreate it despite himself. everyone empathizes saying “I hate when that happens.” me too. in fact, I’m in like with the show because of the writing about writers.

the point of NaNoWriMo is to write. in fact, to write with abandon. to let you learn that words on paper are a thousand times better than words stuck in your head. you cannot edit your head. but you can edit what came out. even if the endeavor seems like mental masturbation that will end up tossed in the recycle bin you can’t know until you get to day 30 with something, anything. and no matter how bad whatever in front of you is it is in fact in front of you.

all that said, I’m still going to underachiever out this year. which is, “you can’t fail if you don’t try.”