I’m dog sitting for the fararara-idays (aka giftmas). I’m amazed by how other people live. For example, the first morning after the kids left the alarm clock blared to life at the crack of 10 to 6. Figuring out how to kill the damn thing in the dark was a hard lesson in UI development. Why doesn’t the freaking OH-EFF-EFF button glow? I finally pushed something that made it stop. Falling back to bed, and you can see this is going a mile away, just about back to dreamland the blasted blasting started again. This time lights came on to investigate disabling it more permanently. Needless to say, it’s dead Jim.

There’s a dishwasher somewhere else in my life that beep, beep, beep, beep, beeps every five minutes after it’s finished it’s cycle. The idea is to be annoying enough for someone to open the door so the dishes can cool more quickly. Seems to me that a electro latch and a spring would be better.

I do have to admit that the dryer and the washer buzzing they’ve finished is pretty useful. Note to the dish washer people: the pair buzzes just once.

This morning at 3:30 a new mystery beep started. Once a minute there was a beeeeeeeeep. Wherewhat the hell was that coming from I groggily wondered. Alarm clock? Nope. Answering machine. Nope. Oven? Yep!. Somehow I’d pressed the wrong button when turning the stove off activating the automatic oven cleaning mode which was set to start at the crack of oh-dark-thirty. But it wouldn’t start that mode unless the oven is locked. Which was why it starting little bird chirping.

The last mystery beep started muffled in another room. And like the oven it chirped like clock work on the minute but alternated two different beep sets. Typing ceased and I started seeking. It was coming from a charging cellphone. Voice mail message. Grrr. Why is voice mail chirping attention?! Since when did voice mail become an annoyance when it’s only jorb is to be a convenience. The voice machine did that as well. Beep, beep, beeped until the message was played. These things just aren’t that important to beep, beep, beep. A bit of reading fixed the answering machine so now it just blink, blink, blinks.

Back to the chirping cell fone. I decided to deal with it. The easy thing to do, put it in shut-the-hell-up mode. Easy enough. But after fucking around with it for 3 minutes it wasn’t clear how to do that. I have better things to do I note. Off then. Hmmm… that was a mystery as well. No power button. Waaa, no power button?! Cheap bastards. Pull the battery then, time to die. Which worked like a charm.

And… nothing is beeping now. The only sound? Rain. Ahhhh… rain.